A Shout Out to My Girl!

And when He desired to manifest grace and beneficence to men, and to set the world in order, He revealed observances and created laws; among them He established the law of marriage, made it as a fortress for well-being and salvation, and enjoined it upon us in that which was sent down out of the heaven of sanctity in His Most Holy Book. He saith, great is His glory: "Marry, O people, that from you may appear he who will remember Me amongst My servants; this is one of My commandments unto you; obey it as an assistance to yourselves."

   Baha'u'llah

In the Baha'i Faith one of the fundamental principles is that marriage can be likened to a "fortress for well-being". While I have heard this for many years, and have sought to understand its meaning over the past several months it has become very clear what this means...at least to me. While I named this blog Russoul's Journey, it is much more accurate to describe it as a journey of a family or community. We are all journeying together, interwoven and interdependent in ways in which we can never fully understand. I feel this a lot lately.. often in places and at times which I do not expect. The power of unity is amazingly strong!

Lately this power or strength has been most evident to me within my own home, as I feel the benefit of my "fortress for well-being". Experiencing the challenges and hardships that life presents us is often not easy. It can be even more difficult when these challenges are visited upon those people who we love dearly. People who are so close to us that we want to do anything that we can to alleviate their hardships, and yet because of reality, we feel almost powerless because there is so little that it seems that we can do. And so it is ironic that although I am currently undergoing chemotherapy, I suspect that it may actually be harder on my dear wife, Lauretta. It is to her that I turn each week when I do another treatment and need to be reminded that although this is "hard", it is "good". She reminds me that the interferon and ribavirin that I am taking are "my army of light"...killing the virus that has been attacking my body. She calls me up and reminds me to drink more water and eat lunch or dinner. And most importantly she reminds me that I am loved! But I know that being there for me all the time (not to mention our kids) is not easy and it is tiring.

I have always felt unbelievably blessed to not only have met Lauretta, but to be married to her! I often wonder if those around me feel as blessed and lucky to have married their best friend! Somehow I suspect that this is often the case when people get married, but that they forget that building a fortress takes a long term commitment and that it is not easy. I believe that some of the stresses that people cite as destroying their marriage, could actually, with prayer and nurturing strengthen their marriage. I am not trying to claim to be an expert or to think that this is easy....but my current experience feels like it is strengthening my marriage in spite of the stress that it is causing.

One of the many blessings that Hepatitis C has brought to me is that it has reminded me of how much in love I am and to experience that love over and over throughout the day! It has also allowed me to feel what it is like to live within a "fortress for well-being", a marriage which keeps me safe in times of tests. I feel that being sick has strengthened our fortress and my personal faith in God. I pray that my dear wife is also having a similar experience and that she is feeling loved and nurtured throughout this. I try to share with Lauretta how much I appreciate her love and support...but I don't really know how......How do you really let someone know how much you love and value them? Do we take enough time to pause and let each other know?

I once called her and told her that I had broken down and then put goofy signs along the highway for a couple miles leading up to me, standing there with flowers and a sign telling her Happy Anniversary!

....anyways I just wanted to give a shout out to my BFF (best friend forever) and let her know that I couldn't do this without her! Lauretta, I Love You!!! It has been a long time that we have been traveling together and each year gets better! Thanks for all you are doing and for your committment and support along the journey!